Ok, so i'm new to this so bare with me ...I've had a on and off relationship with my Father. When i was real little I use to be really close and when i grew up a little i noticed he was a jerk to people and I would alway's think God i hope I'm never like that.. He doesn't Think before he Talks. and he has a childish Annoyence to him..I really want to be Closer to my dad, Or at least Not Hate to Walk in the same room with him. And I feel like i'm the only person who has gone through this. I just want to see if there is anybody else who feels this way about there parent???
Girls by Design: This is a forum » General
Father Issues ??
(11 posts)-
Posted 8 months ago #
-
I was just about to post about the same topic. I am going through what you are going through right now. My dad is way to over protective. I think its a part of him, that he does not want us to go through all the hardships he went through, but that does not change the fact that he is way too strict to me and my siblings. I am already in college and he does not let me go out of the house, even if it is for school orgs, I am still not allowed to stay at school really late. I cant stay over a friend's house overnight, and get this I am not allowed to commute back home. Is there anybody else who has a strict dad? I understand that he only does this to protect us, but I feel like he treats us like we are still little kids, I dont think that he sees that we are already growing up and are already able to make our own decisions. Any advise on how do I deal with this?
"A journey of a thousand miles, starts with a single step." - Lao TzuPosted 8 months ago # -
sorry, i don't really have any advice. i'm on the same side as both of you :(
"Being yourself, being different, being unique are all the things to be proud of. You need to have confidence in yourself. Once you’ve got that, you can accomplish anything in the world."- Kristin KreukPosted 8 months ago # -
Hell yes! I started breaking away from my dad in grade 6! Just like you, we were really close growing up but then I found out that he's not a very good person. There are only three things that I have ever heard come out of his mouth: 1) a complaint about something broken in the house, me, or a co-worker. 2) an equation or explanation for something he considers "common sense" like how it's "obvious" that keeping a fork or your dinner plate without holding it means it's going to slide off and dent the floor. 3) Baby talk towards me. He really doesn't know how to be a parent so he copies all of my mom's methods or tries to buy my love etc.
There are a lot of things i could complain about and I really don't want to end up like him either. He has hardly any compassion. I mean, he yelled at a old man who was a VETERAN from the war (he was wearing a suit with medals) because he was walking to slow and blocking his way out of a parking lot! You are definitely not alone. believe me.You Are Free :)Posted 8 months ago # -
I think the hardest thing to accept is that he will always be my dad. Dont get me wrong I love him, I mean I would not be in this world without him, but sometimes it just gets really irritating to a point that he is already ruining my social life.
I once asked a GUY friend his opinion on why dad is so strict when it comes to their daughters. He came up with a theory that maybe fathers think that what they thought about when they were younger are the things that guys our age think about right now. I wish I could elaborate further, but once I asked him what guys think about my friend's face turned red and switched the topic. hehe! BUSTED!
anyway what do you girls think?
Posted 8 months ago # -
Trust me your not alone. Growing up I always thought that I was close to my dad, we would curl up and watch a movie together, but when I reached the fourth grade he seemed distance and he would get mad and yell really easily. So I tried not to spend as mush time with him because I knew that I didn't want to be like that. At the end of my 4th grade year he got really mad at me and picked me up and threw me across the room. He had never laid a hand on me in my entire life. I knew that things were about to change. The next year my parents got divorced. We (my mom, sister and I) came home from a vacation to find that my dad had, had an affair on my mom. We were all heart broken, she (my mom) filed for divorce and we moved back to our home town. My mom placed me in counseling. It took me two years to come to terms with my dad. Now I'm 16 and I haven't spoken to my father in two years and he has tried to contact me in anyway. So remember your not alone. There are many of us like you and we know what it's like.
Your friend,
MeaganA canter is the cure for every evil.
~Benjamin DisraeliPosted 7 months ago # -
hey Meagan!! it seems that we do have a lot of things in common.. sigh.. I wish i had the answer to this problem though.. I want to break away from my dad as soon as possible, but because he pays for my tuition fee he acts like he owns me in every way and that he thinks I am useless. I often hear him say that he is better than me or something. I think he even got mad at me because I got sick one time and had to be hospitalized..
Posted 7 months ago # -
Hey Simplemath, I'm sorry that you have father issues too. My mom always says, "If you have to make someone else feel small in order for you to feel big, your not a man at all." I'm sorry.
Posted 7 months ago # -
well i dno if this will help but i'll try..so i have the same problem with my dad and dont worry you are not alone..my dad is a really big a-hole, like as much as i love my dad he is just an ass to anyone and everyone regardless if its family, friends, or even just some random stranger..i'm still dealing with his childish attitude but one thing that did work was that i was very blunt but kind of nice to him.. like he always told me that he may not like what people say but if they tell the truth he'll respect them and just back off and stuff.. after i told him though he said he was sorry and all that and he would put an effort into being "careful"...he still is an a-hole but every time he says something rude it'll click in for him and he'll just say I'm sorry..well hope that helped!
"There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes."Posted 7 months ago # -
hey girls thanks for all the support. You DID help me because I know that I am not alone. I am quite used to it by now. I try to look at the good, that my dad has. The thing is even though he emphasizes it, he does still support us financially.
Posted 7 months ago # -
hell yeah!!
my story is the same as yours..Posted 6 months ago #
Reply
You must log in to post.